Invalidity

1. Severe diabetes & gout to begin with (fruit & veg to stave off gout, fruit & veg bad for my diabetes) followed by cancer of the rectum, then a shadow was detected on the liver, this week I've been informed of a probable cancer of the prostate, plus I'm taking tablets for bad cholesterol. Insulin (fast & slow), and anti-coagulant injections; vitamins, cholesterol tablets, next monday a prostate biopsy, two weeks later the start of radio & chemo-therapies, so I'm not going to ...complain about a little oedema/dropsy. On the whole I don't feel ill at all, 2 & 4 days ago my blood-pressure lowered and I felt very tired, and I'm losing weight slightly. As I said I don't feel ill at all, it's only the doctors telling me I'm ill that I know, that and a certain looseness of my bowels causing me to have to wear 'protection' 24 hours a day. My blood sugar level is too high because for the last 7 weeks I've been more or less stationary, so now I'm making an effort to go for a fairly robust but limited walk between the nurses visits: I can't go far by myself or drive in case I collapse. I'm relying almost entirely on my daughter to look after my affairs; interviews, paperwork, mail, shopping etc., which can't be easy with a 3 children and a full time job. Mealtimes although regular are boring, take a gander at these forbidden foods: green vegetables raw & cooked, dried vegetables, fruit raw & cooked, compote, fruit juices, dry fruit, wholemeal bread, pastries & cakes, everything cooked in fat. No sugar. Avoid fibre. The good news is that my morale is very high and I'm enjoying myself finding things to put onto facebook, no time to be bored, a lot of reading and writing involved. The bad news is that not all my necessities from the chemist's are free, and neither is food. I haven't touched a penny/centime since Dec. 28 and that was just my evening's takings. I am facing a difficult time financially (I am already with my sickness) having lost all my money between the French Social Security claiming thousands, nearly bankrupting me and my three years out of work due to my pub burning down leaving me with nothing until the Phoenix gave me a temporary respite. As things are my morale is high but I can't promise that my morale won't take a downturn. Destiny calls, will I be back in my bar, the surgeon said to me after one operation that I have a 'sacré constitution,' also 'patience & courage.'